It’s in the cauldron of sexuality that all of our fears and vulnerabilities arise.
Mike & Louise Lousada
When you slow everything right down and strip away the fancy thrills, put the toys and sexy lingerie to one side and you meet in stillness – meeting through the eyes and with the breath, hearts can become ablaze in connection.
When you put performance to one side, the ideas of shoulds and should nots and occupy your body like a sacred vessel, enjoying the folds, and bumps and hairs and moles. Dissolving the focused thoughts of your mind and softening into the experience of sensation and pleasure in your body, delighting in the connection with yourself in relation to your beloved.
When you lower your protective layers and peer out from behind your masks, opening your heart and cultivating an intimacy that stirs to the depths of your soul…..
Chooooo Choooo
Along comes the self development express train promptly arriving to highlight the fears, vulnerabilities and wounds that have been sitting patiently, waiting for the perfect time to surface. The endorphin rushed expansion transports you into contraction…and it’s in this contracted place that we can put on our magical cloak of wonder and tenderly see what parts of us need our love, care and attention.
Sexuality, embodiment and relationships have been my greatest teachers and my biggest catalyst towards awakening.
Sex.is.vulnerable, it’s raw, it’s messy, it’s perfectly imperfect.
Being embodied is vulnerable, feeling it all, the highs and lows, being seen and showing yourself.
Opening our heart is vulnerable, holding those old fears of rejection and abandonment and breathing deeply into the fullness of our being and letting the air sweetly hold us and regulate us back into a feeling of safety and belonging.
When we open to our sexuality, a lot of powerful life-force energy can start to move – so as well as experiencing the ecstatic highs, we will also come up against our blocks. Old memories may surface, trickier emotions may grab our attention and take over our body, younger parts of us may emerge, the anxious, the fearful, the not good enoughs, the too much part, the stuck, the frozen, the dissociated.
Deep breath. Observe. Witness. Exhale.
The golden nugget and initiatory task here is to not abandon yourself, to not reject those parts that want to stay hidden from you and your beloved. What those parts need most is your undivided attention, curiosity and love. When you can truly meet those parts, feel them and allow them to express -then slowly, one by the one, the energy of your sexual blocks will begin to dissolve and you will return to a place of heart and sex opening expansion.
You do not need to do ‘the work’ alone. These wounds, insecurities and fears originated from our early relationships and so the most potent healing can occur when you can reveal yourself in relation to another.
In my work as a Psychosexual Somatics Coach, I offer a compassionate space for you to explore your fears and blocks around sex and intimacy. Through the process of coming home to your body, we can cultivate a loving space to help you soften and welcome those previously rejected parts into your being, bringing more care and acceptance into the wholeness that is you.
If this speaks to you and you want to know more about how my work could support you, then get in touch – eshana@loveandcareforyourself.co.uk -I’d love to hear from you and to dive into your unique and colourful cauldron of sexuality.
