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I’ve been a total stress head recently and can’t seem to feel grounded, I’ve been comfort eating and alcohol has crept into my lifestyle again after a long dry spell, I’m exercising less and feeling pretty yucky. I’m running away, it’s all a bit much. Very ‘old’ Lesley behaviours present.

This morning my friend Wiggz shared this video and it instantly made me feel happy. It’s the video diary taken on the last day of a week long retreat I attended as part of my tantra training. It was a profound week that opened me in ways my imagination didn’t even know existed. I was peaceful, still, connected, in my body… happy.

It’s important to me that these retreats and seminars are not just a bubble or escape from real life. I’ve learnt so many things in my training that I have integrated into my life. The experience I described in the video of connecting to my energy has been the most important shift so far and it makes me a little sad that I’ve allowed the pressures and stresses of life to overshadow this. Tantra is about connecting with myself first and then connecting with others, but its also about experiencing the potency of life itself. Tantra is being present in the everyday, being present in the pleasure and joy but also being present in the discomfort too. What a gift that this moment was captured on video and can act as a reminder for me to come back to myself, to allow my feelings instead of running away. I look forward to feeling vibrant in my stillness outside of a workshop context. My whole being, alive.

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